Thursday, July 31, 2008
29th Movement
Wesley called me a junkie...just because I posted my MSN nicknames as some drug names...eeeeewww...don't ask me why.Pothead or junkie...sometimes we all need some stimulants to hype ourselves up, I don't do drugs by the way.
Junkie:
Initially used to describe a heroin addict, "junk" being a slang term for heroin. However, as the term gained currency, enthusiasts in any specific area began to call themselves “junkies“, as in the phrases “science fiction junkie“ or “political junkie“.
English use of the term in a sentence: “Mr. Cornish, stop your drug use, it has turned you into a real junkie.” Or other variations of the term, such as ‘junk box’. For instance, “Mr. Cornish, stop being such a junk box.”
Labels: Inspiration?
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Random tune
I'll be posting things about Eschatology soon, so those interested, stay in contact. =]Labels: Random Tune
Short story
Right right, I wrote this while I was in class. I named it ambition, I don't know why but yeah.And I realised I seeme to be blogging less about myself...but that ain't true, read between the lines.
-----Ambition-----
His opponent was limp, with his hands hanging from his shoulders.
A head under his crotch, standing 20 feet from the ground and in the center of the cage, where the wiring had been weakened from repeated slamming and kicking.
His head was pouring with blood, he could barely stand on his two feet, but he forced himself to.
Soon he would leap onto the weak wiring, and most possibly land his whole weight on his opponent’s head. But, of course he knew, that he was going to break both his knees, considering that they were already both weak.
He looked at the crowds around him, and heard their cry for more. Their battle cry, chanting his name over and over again, he took a while to relish the moment. He was, after all, the World Heavyweight Champion, and he wasn’t going to lose the title tonight.
He hooked his opponent’s both hands with his, adjusted his position so give maximum impact.
Then he leapt.
A head under his crotch, standing 20 feet from the ground and in the center of the cage, where the wiring had been weakened from repeated slamming and kicking.
His head was pouring with blood, he could barely stand on his two feet, but he forced himself to.
Soon he would leap onto the weak wiring, and most possibly land his whole weight on his opponent’s head. But, of course he knew, that he was going to break both his knees, considering that they were already both weak.
He looked at the crowds around him, and heard their cry for more. Their battle cry, chanting his name over and over again, he took a while to relish the moment. He was, after all, the World Heavyweight Champion, and he wasn’t going to lose the title tonight.
He hooked his opponent’s both hands with his, adjusted his position so give maximum impact.
Then he leapt.
-----End-----
Right, the end, constructive comments. I had only like, one or two comments the last time, those silent taggers, I don't mind if you use another username to tag, just do. LOL.
I'll explain the story after a while, if there is a need... =/
Labels: Short Stories
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
28th Movement
When a girl kisses a guy
When a girl kisses her boyfriend
When a daughter kisses her father
When a mother kisses her child
What does it add up to?
Love?
Does a girl love a boy when she kisses him?
Does a daughter love her father when she kisses him?
When a mother kisses her child, does she love him?
Watch a child grow, and see how much love you can have for just
one
simple
child
and just waiting, waiting, waiting...
for that
one
simple
kiss
Labels: Inspiration?
Monday, July 28, 2008
27th Movement
Three Mondays, no wins.I repeat: THREE MONDAYS, NO WINS.
*BEEP* *BEEP* *BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP*
Like what the hell, eh? I thought bringing in Terence and Reggie would change things but what the *beep*, nothing's changed.
Heck care, may not even go next week, it's becoming a waste of time, nothing but a thrashing from the others.
Like today, the ball seemed to have a fetish for faces and I managed to block 2 or 3 of it before it went flying into my nose bridge. I was sent crashing and burning onto the floor, but at least the angry enregy was sent out through shouts and screams.
Like what the *beep*
Labels: Soccer Stress Soccer
Friday, July 25, 2008
26th Movement
Life is a fight, a fight for survival.
And in this course of survival, we find ourselves destroying others.
It is like climbing a ladder, with other people on it.
We have two choices, find a way to work with the person up ahead, or push him off the ladder.
Many people have chosen the latter.
Life is a fight for survival.
Labels: Inspiration?
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Random tune
I feel like starting a Fight Club...WHO'S WITH ME?
=P
Labels: Random Tune
Random tune
I haven't posted what Shazly wanted me to post, so here it is.1. What do you think of the world we're living in now?
~ Could be better
2. Who is more important to you? friends or gf?
~ GF
3. Who are the people you trust the most?
~ Jesus, God, that’s all, not even me
4. Do you think you have enough confidence?
~ No
5. What do you think of YOURSELF?
~ I’m a piece of shit trying to become a fertiliser
6. Do you believe in seeing a rainbow after the rain?
~ I never look out for it
7. What is your goal for this year?
~ Master both the flute and alto
8. Do you believe in eternal love?
~ Maybe
9. What feeling do you love the most?
~ Exhilaration
10. What are the requirements of your the other half?
~ Like what I like
11. List the best moments in your life.
~ The last Band investiture
~ When my gf said yes
~ Baptism and Confirmation
~ Entrance into TOG
12. What do you hate most?
~ Me and class, they both rank the same
13. Between love and money?
~ Love vs money…of course love lar! You cannot serve God and Money at the same time!
14. What's the most attractive things about a person to you?
~ The way she smiles
15. Describe the person who tagged you using 5 words.
~ Skinny, mutt, good goalkeeper, Germany fanatic
16. Who can you not live without?
~ Hypocrites
17.If you have one wish now, what would you wish for?
~ I'd wish for God to answer every question I ask
18.How do you want to be remembered?
~ Short answer: For just being myself
.~ Long answer: See previous posts.
19. Your definition of LOVE
~ Love=God, Love is patient, kind, generous and forgiving
20. Do you believe in dreams come true?~ what kind of bullshit is that?
Instructions: Remove 1 ques from above and add in your personal ques. Make a total of 20 ques and tag 8 ppl. List them out at the end of your post. Notify them in your cbox! Whoever does the tag will have blessings from all the lucky 8. (:
Remove: 8. Do you believe in eternal love?
My question: Who do you want to live forever with you?
My 8 people:
DORODOT!!!
JOEL LYE
WESLEY the bassist
IRIS (if she sees this)
SIEWKENG (if she sees this)
CAIYI the veggie
SALOME
DORINDA KYQ
Labels: Random Tune
25th Movement
Thank God for today, I mean, seriously. Don't ask why...Joel (not the E24R one) asked me to try and learn the song "I Can Only Imagine", but it is very, very hard and I don't think I can master it by this Saturday. *BEEP* it.
Don't get me mistaken, it's not that I'm lousy, it IS hard.
I know some of you are going to mock me for being "lousy", *BEEP* off, those who want to.
Labels: Inspiration?
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Short story explanation
Alright, first one is a flop, lucky I did not sign up for Geraldine's writers club.Writer says:
When I wrote this, I imagined my own internal conflict. The names are my own, Justin Alexius Faith, although I never mentioned Faith in the short narration.
Justin shot Faith, with Alexius by both men's side. I was trying to portray the aftermath of an inner fight between two personalities, with a third acting as a neutral.
The hall is supposed to represent the emptiness of the human mind, the corner where the different conflicting personalities meet. What I believe, in every person, whether schiziophrenic or not, there are more than two personalities. It is just that some are more normal than others because they have a more dominant personality which overcomes the submissive one.
The sentences like "I loved him" are the thoughts of the person himself, the real man 'outside' this fight: The man who is walking on the real world.
I also tried to portray the mystical powers in the human mind by showing first that Justin dropped the gun, then re-appearing again in the last scene.
Obviously, there was something Alexius could have done to stop the 'bloodshed', but she didn't. Some split personas are like that, acting on a neutral basis and forbidding themselves to participate in any source of conflict, even if they can stop it.
And of course, Justin's personality overcame Faith's personality, but which one was the better one, no one will ever know.
Labels: Short Story explanation
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Short story
I have written a short story, please post comments (constructive comments) and also I will post my notes for the story afterwards.*I haven't given it a title yet.
-----start-----
The hall was empty, save the pillars which gave an eerie feel. The moonlight shining through the broken windows completed the ambience.
He tormented me.
The gun rested in his hand, blood dripping from his fist. A body lay on the ground, and the perpetrator stood at his side a few meters away.
I loved him as my own.
“Why?” The girl by his side wept, crawling towards the body and trembling at the sight, “Why?”
I gave him everything, I trusted him.
The girl reached the body, and she shook him, trying to wake him up from his eternal slumber. The standing man dropped his gun, the sound echoing through the halls, ricocheting from every corner.
I hated him.
“Justin…why? WHY?!”
He gave me strength, he gave me thought.
Justin walked over to be in the view of the girl; she glared at him, tears flowing down her pale and gentle face. “Justin, he wanted to help you…why did you…why did you…”
He gave me a life to live.
“Why?” Justin stood by the girl, “I don’t think that should be the question now, Alexius, not why, not why…”
Justin stepped towards her, closer and closer, and then said.
“Not why, Alexius…But WHAT did you not do about it…”
A gun appeared into his hand, and its nozzle aimed right at her head.
-----End-----
Comments (constructive ones only!) are welcome.
Labels: Short Stories
Monday, July 21, 2008
Random tune
Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?
Where am I now?
Where am I now?Where am I now?
Where am I now?
Where am I now?
Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?
Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?
Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?
Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?
Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?
Where am I now?
Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?
Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?
Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?
Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?Where am I now?
Labels: Random Tune
Friday, July 18, 2008
Random tune
I just realised that underaged people are reading my blog posts, so I'll not use vulgarities anymore but I'll replace them with *BEEP*. Haha...I'm being considerate, aren't I? =]Labels: Random Tune
Thursday, July 17, 2008
24th Movement
These are the things I got for my birthday =]Iris' HUUUUGE Card
I can't let you see what she wrote...private =]
Godpa's Book on prayer
TOG's Starscream Action figure (It can transform too!)
Bro got me a Goalkeeping jersey, time to seriously consider it as a career...
And finally, Dot and Enid's Birthday Wish Card! One of the most sincere presents I have!
And the last one is actually "Kung Fu Panda", Dot sent it to me, althought the quality isn't that good, it's nice to watch though...haahaa...
Labels: Birthday Aftermath
Lyrics - Fall For You
Fall For You lyricsThe best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting
Could it be that we have been this way before
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core
But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I won't live to see another dayI swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find
This is not what I intended
I always swore to you I'd never fall apart
You always thought that I was stronger
I may have failed
But I have loved you from the start
But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I won't live to see another dayI swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
It's impossible
So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in
I'm yours to keep
And hold onto your words
'Cause talk is cheap
And remember me tonight
When you're asleep
Because tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
Tonight will be the night that I will fall for you
Over again
Don't make me change my mind
Or I won't live to see another dayI swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find
See previous post for video
Labels: Fall For You
23rd Movement
Here's another music video I find refreshing. Joel sent me the song through bluetooth and I thought it'll be fantastic if I saw the video, this is a cool song anyway.
The song is "Fall For You" by Secondhand Serenade and it's quite beautiful...my daughter seems to like it.
And oh ya, Iris gave me a HUGE birthday card yesterday, topped with a loud Birthday song IN SCHOOL. Luckily not many people were there, I wouldn't say it's embarassing but it is heart-warming to see your child still happy and like a kid. Jesus once said that "(secrets) will be revealed to the childlike" or somewhere along that line.
Will post lyrics for this later...
Labels: Fall For You
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Random tune
Something's...wrong today...Labels: Random Tune
22nd Movement
Woohooo...the party was yesterday...at least a mini party....my first in like, 18 years...TOG came, except and Beverley had to leave early before the cake was cut...sad...
TOG bought me a very "youthful" present, the worst part was that they left the price tag on! I won't reveal what the price is...lol...
Kyou Un, or should I say, CHARLENE (yeap, she wanted that name, credits to Cheryl [not my class one]), came to my party also, she was rather quiet and of course, refused to be sociable...haiyo...
Dorothy and Enid came also, they were the last to arrive and the FIRST to leave, since Enid was in a rush. Luckily I got Kung Fu Panda from DOT before she left...hawhawhaw...
Godpa and Cheryl came also, he gave me a book on prayer...he was asking me in the afternoon what I'd like for my birthday and I told him anything, but if I could see the face of God it'll be great. He gave me the book and on it he wrote, "I may not be able to bring God's face down but I'm sure this will help you." I'm sure it definately will. =]
My brother gave me a jersey, goalkeeper's custom jersey with paddings and all. I'd need a few muscles though, since the sleeves were rather baggy.
Here are some pictures from yesterday and a video also, notice how rude Jared is to his cousin...lol...
Yeap, TOG gave me a STARSCREAM action figure, it took a nose dive into the cake before the picture was taken... o_0 Reggie's smile is rather wide...
Labels: Birthday Aftermath
Sunday, July 13, 2008
21st Movement
Bible Sunday today, I don't think it's in the Church Calender but anyway...it was a good time, TOG had a play and it was quite good, at least from the feedback that we received...Alan commended me about the script, but it wasn't an individual effort, everyone had a part to play and God made a tremendous breakthrough for me here.
Tuesday is an important day, a very important day, I must remember to wear guards.
Friday, July 11, 2008
20th Movement
I gave Iris a present today, though it isn't her birthday yet...=]I gave her a card and a letter from God, I believe you can can find it if you want, it's quite common, but the unique thing I did was to highlight certain words that I felt was relevant to her life, it's small things like this that actually helps in our life. We do not need to know that Captain America saved the world from a nuclear disaster, all we need is to know that we are loved by those that we love.
Happy Birthday Iris =]
Labels: My Dear Daughter...
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
19th Movement
Finished watching Hellsing...only 13 episodes in all and it kinda freaks me out...haha...I have to finish my Professional Profiling fast, and the interview would be the hardest part. I plan to finish it asap, but given my energy condition, I don't think I can tahan all the way. I'll try though.
Then there's Stampy's 12 thing, a CE project I signed up for, I still seem lost in the team but I'm going to stay in there and see what happens. It turned out good for my time in TOG. =]
I'm going to try to write short narrations for now, Geraldine had this writing exercise on her Wordpress...I wanted to sign up but I feel that I'm not qualified for it yet, so I'll just post it here and see what comments I get.
Labels: Inspiration?
Monday, July 07, 2008
18th Movement
Back from soccer, damn bloody tired like what the hell. I haven't been talking to my girlfriend for days, I'll call her tomorrow.I'm trying to plan a lot now, I'll set my priorities now, haha and I'll also work harder, but not at school.
I'm glad I'm alive, so that I can be an example to others. I'll climb out the mountain and shout:
DON'T BE LIKE ME!!!!!!!!!
Labels: Soccer Stress Soccer
17th Movement
Went to Wesley's blog and he definately doesn't like school...lol...I feel the same way, HAHA...Going to leave early today, GOT VALID REASON OK! Rehearsal for Bible Sunday at 4.30pm, I wanted to leave at about 3 but seeing the circumstances, I'd rather leave at 12 now... o_0
I emailed Kevin just now, had a question about one of his books...if anyone of you can answer me please feel free and don't just cite from Wikipedia, I don't trust it well enough.
Here's the question:
Eschatology: What is it briefly? I know it means "Study of the Last Things" but of course, what are the topics in there?
Right, that's my question...I hope I get an answer from Kevin soon... =]
Labels: Inspiration?
Sunday, July 06, 2008
16th Movement
Woohoo...Bible Sunday is nearing, and I can see why Brian is getting so stressed. I should symphatise with him and listen to him for the next rehearsal, after all, he's leading a tough life right now.Exciting to actually act with new people, especially young kids with lively energy. At first I thought they were bored and all that but it seems that they are actually looking forwad to it, WOW!
I borrowed 4 books from Kevin on Saturday, TOG was at his house for Julian's farewell party. He's flying off to Australia for studies...everyone dedicated a song to him and I dedicated Shadow of the Day by Linkin Park. He managed to guess it was I who dedicated it to him, quite amazing considering the fact that we aren't that close anyway. The last time we talked before the farewell party was like, last year?
Oh, and we got a NEW addition to Monday Soccer Boys! His name's ANDREW, Alex's brother and of course, he would have to come constantly before he is OFFICIALLY in...so yeah.
Here is the Monday Soccer Boys list so far:
Outfielders:
Dinah
Dhana
Jacky
Casper
Brandon
Raj
Daryl
Keith
Situ Huijie
Andrew (NEW)
Wei Hao
Jiaming
Jen Yi
Kai
Chinkey
Other random indian guys who come and go
Goalkeepers:
Alex
Wei Min
Shazly
Justin
Yeap, that's our line-up, I might have missed a few though. But I'm sure I'll be notified if I did =]
Tomorrow is Directing and Performance and rehearsal from 4.30 to 6pm...good thing there's time for dinner and then soccer!
Labels: Soccer Stress Soccer
Friday, July 04, 2008
15th Movement
Back to the topic of RAP!!! Woohooo!!!I just like rap, don't know why.
I'm sure you have all heard of rap and rock mixing up together to get a new genre. One of the rap-metal bands I like is most probably Linkin Park. Most of their songs have both rap and rock in it, perhaps to the extent of metal. That's why it's called rap-metal o_0.
Rap is definately music, no arguments about it. How you define music, rap qualifies for all of it. Rap isn't a bunch of thrash, but rather a misunderstood music style.
By the way, the video above is "From the Inside" by Linkin Park.
Labels: Rap = Thrash?
Thursday, July 03, 2008
14th Movement
What is art? This came to my mind after I saw the Understanding Test's questions today. It was on Art Criticism and Analysis and of course, it gave me a lot of thinking to do after I saw this picture:
Scary shit, isn't it? I was freaked out the first time I saw it...scary like hell...
But it is, after all, a good piece of work, how it captures emotions and all that, but gruesome and yes, those are bones on the floor, I think.
What kind of art is this? This is DISGUSTING!!! But it after all, gives a message, depending on what you perceive of it.
This is what the artist commented about it:
“A long time ago I made a piece called ‘Art Must Be Beautiful, Artist Must Be Beautiful’. At that time, I thought that art should be disturbing rather than beautiful. But at my age now, I have started thinking that beauty is not so bad. My life is full of contradictions. Many come from my childhood. I was born in Yugoslavia. My father and mother are divorced. As an adult, I recently wanted to go back to help them because of the war. So I called my father to ask him what he needs, and he dictates a long list – antibiotics, bandages, penicillin, toilet paper, coffee, sugar, powdered milk, all these basic things for survival. Then I call my mother and ask what she needs. She says, “I need Chanel lipstick, Absolute Red, Number 345, and hair spray.” I am between these two. It took me a long time to come to terms with this because I've always tried to put a face in front of the public that is very tough, very male, a going-forward-no-matter-what performance attitude…I decided that now I need glamour. I need something to love. I need to see all these other parts of me which I had absolutely never allowed to exist. I had been ashamed of this part of me and let them go.”
- “Deeper and deeper: interview with Marina Abramovic”; Art Journal, Summer, 1999 by Janet A. Kaplan
- “Deeper and deeper: interview with Marina Abramovic”; Art Journal, Summer, 1999 by Janet A. Kaplan
And other than that, LOVELY DAY!!!
Labels: Inspiration?
160th Post
I'm not suffering from mild schizophrenia...I'm ENJOYING mild schizophrenia...
Maybe I'm just paranoid, maybe I'm just thinking too much, but who is to say? I like to talk to myself and like to talk to objects, I KNOW that I'm talking to myself but I just continue to do it. I don't see any harm done, but I think that one day I'm going to really turn mental...
But come on...I'm sure I'm going to ENJOY it...heehee...
Schizophrenia, how...addictive...
Labels: Schizophrenia?
Random tune
When are you going to tell everyone you're nothing but a pack of LIES?
Labels: Random Tune
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
12th Movement
Many people say that rap is not a style of music, my brother says it's just talking. I'd have to disagree, rap is a new style of music that's already up and going.Rap is talking in sync to rhythm, how many people can do that? A master of rap would be able to talk with rhythm and even pronounce every word correctly, how many people can do that nowadays?
Sure, some raps may not seem to make sense at all but how many songs make sense anyway?
And the best part of it is that rap is probably one of the most direct, straightforward expressive songs ever. They tell stories, pass messages and even influence lifestyles, either in a bad or good way, depending on the rapper.
Here is a rap that is expressive, it tells a story, and it even evokes emotion in most probably some of us.
This is the censored version, any requests for the uncensored version will be entertained.
This is Cleaning Out My Closet by Eminem, I'm sure I don't need to explain the story to you, just listen and figure out what he's saying.
I like this song.
Labels: Rap = Thrash?
Month Events
July events ranked in priority:1) Bible Sunday
2) Iris' Birthday
3) My Birthday
Don't ask which date is my birthday, I like to keep it private.
I'm in class now, people are presenting so I'll just stop.
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
11th Symphony
First thing's first, I'd like to thank Shazly for calling me a MUSE, for those who do not know:In Greek mythology, the Muses are a sisterhood of goddesses or spirits, their number set at nine by Classical times, who embody the arts and inspire the creation process with their graces through remembered and improvised song and stage, writing, traditional music, and dance. They were water nymphs, associated with the springs of Helicon and with Pieris, from which they are sometimes called the Pierides. The Olympian system set Apollo as their leader, Apollon Mousagetēs.
I'm no Muse, I just like music and some other forms of art.
And also, Thanks Dorinda, it really helped, though it may take some time to brush it off. All that effort in trying to impress is really quite a lot, so ya.
And Shazly asked me this question:
How do you want to be remembered?
It is a very, very hard question to answer, like seriously.
I'd try to give the answer now, and to those at the tagboard, answer it too. =] I'm sure I'll be surprised at the answers.
My answer:
I want to be remembered for what I did, both good and bad. I want to be remembered by those whom I love the most, my daughters, Cherie, and those that I have tried to help.
I want to be remembered for my laughter, for the joy I brought into people's lives. For the stupid, crazy times, and for the times I was there when people needed me.
But those mentioned before, won't happen. I'll just be remembered by name, age, school, career and all that. Love is a risky investment, and there is no guarantee your life lives in the hearts of those that you love.
Right, my answer may seem emo-shit and all, but who cares? Honesty is the best policy.
And those silent readers out there not tagging me, I know who you are...I'm watching you...heeheeheeheeheeheehee...
Labels: Will you remember me?
Random tune
Someone needs a hug
Labels: Random Tune
10th Slur
No matter what I do, it just seems that I can't make my peers proud of me. Not anyone is...impress, proud of me whatever the stupid word is.My parents were never proud of me, they say it through their teeth but you can feel whether they really are speaking the truth. It's something unexplainable.
My brother got 253 marks for PSLE, got into Catholic High, they were so proud of him they still keep the picture of the day he got the results.
My sister got 261 marks for PSLE, got into Ang Mo Kio Secondary, they were so proud of her they got her a new room and my aunt bought her a new Ipod Nano.
I got 195 for PSLE, obviously I did my best, got into Chong Boon Secondary, and they just said, "good try".
My brother joined the drama group in Secondary school. Every performance he had, my mother always found out herself.
My sister is currently in the drama group in Secondary School. She tries to persuade my mother to not come, but she still insists on going.
My batch of Secondary School Band attained the first Gold award at SYF, and when we had a concert, my mother would wait until I said something about it. If I didn't, she wouldn't go.
My brother went into RJC, and my parents always talked about him when they were among relatives.
I'm in Republic Polytechnic, 'nuff said.
No matter what performance I have, no matter how hard I try, I can never get them to be proud of me SINCERELY. Just where did I go wrong? What must I do for my parents to be impressed?
I guess it's impossible, fuck it already. I've had enough, I can never do anything right, in every sense of the word.
Labels: Outcasted
9th Coda
Every night I pray to God, and ask Him to make tomorrow a better day. Sometimes He does, sometimes He doesn't. Some days get so difficult, I just want to cry out loud. Some days remind me of the past, and makes me want to break something.But I'm alive and I should be thankful for it, God could just snuff me out anytime He likes, no reason needed. So I'd just live day by day and see how the days go.
I'm not a very expressive person, so I can't reveal too much of my true feelings here. I don't know why, I want to, but sometimes it's hard.
Right, this isn't some emo shit thing, it's just a thought so for those looking for emo things to "emo" their day, please fuck off.
Labels: emo shit thing