Tuesday, July 01, 2008
10th Slur

No matter what I do, it just seems that I can't make my peers proud of me. Not anyone is...impress, proud of me whatever the stupid word is.

My parents were never proud of me, they say it through their teeth but you can feel whether they really are speaking the truth. It's something unexplainable.

My brother got 253 marks for PSLE, got into Catholic High, they were so proud of him they still keep the picture of the day he got the results.
My sister got 261 marks for PSLE, got into Ang Mo Kio Secondary, they were so proud of her they got her a new room and my aunt bought her a new Ipod Nano.
I got 195 for PSLE, obviously I did my best, got into Chong Boon Secondary, and they just said, "good try".

My brother joined the drama group in Secondary school. Every performance he had, my mother always found out herself.
My sister is currently in the drama group in Secondary School. She tries to persuade my mother to not come, but she still insists on going.
My batch of Secondary School Band attained the first Gold award at SYF, and when we had a concert, my mother would wait until I said something about it. If I didn't, she wouldn't go.

My brother went into RJC, and my parents always talked about him when they were among relatives.
I'm in Republic Polytechnic, 'nuff said.

No matter what performance I have, no matter how hard I try, I can never get them to be proud of me SINCERELY. Just where did I go wrong? What must I do for my parents to be impressed?

I guess it's impossible, fuck it already. I've had enough, I can never do anything right, in every sense of the word.

Labels: Outcasted